The Adult in the Room (Whether I Like It or Not)

I didn’t exactly plan on writing a manifesto.

Honestly, my original life plan involved listening to Green Day, avoiding eye contact, and hopefully retiring before the climate wars started in earnest.

But then I looked around at 2025 and realized that the modern world has essentially lost its mind, and somehow, against all odds, my generation has become the designated driver.

So, I wrote another book. It’s called You Were Right the First Time, and it is currently sitting on my editor’s desk, likely covered in red ink and tears.

The premise is simple: We are the “Analog Bridge.” We are the only human beings currently alive who are fluent in two completely different civilizations. We remember a world where “friending” someone meant physically helping them move a couch, not clicking a button.

We remember when privacy wasn’t a luxury setting on a browser, but a default state of existence because we didn’t carry tracking devices in our pockets. And because we speak both languages—the feral, unsupervised past and the hyper-connected, anxious future—we are the only ones who can see exactly what we lost in the translation.

This book is my attempt to claw back some of that lost wisdom. I wanted to explore why the specific boredom of a Sunday afternoon in 1987 was actually a superpower for creativity, not a medical condition to be treated with an iPad.

I wanted to articulate why “selling out” was a myth we told ourselves before we realized that financial stability is actually the only thing that buys you creative freedom.

I felt the need to defend the Lawn Dart, not because I want to impale anyone, but because I believe a little bit of risk creates the kind of resilience that is currently vanishing from the gene pool.

We are currently the “Sandwich Generation,” squeezed between aging parents who refuse to listen and children who feel everything at maximum volume. We are the reluctant spine of society, the ones fixing the Wi-Fi and de-escalating the drama.

This book is for us. It’s a validation that your skepticism wasn’t negativity; it was an immune system against the “Sea-Monkey” scams of the modern age. It’s proof that your sarcasm is actually a high form of intelligence and a necessary tool for survival.

Basically, I wrote the manual I wished I had. It’s coming soon. Until then, you can keep rolling your eyes at the “synergy meetings” and the “mindfulness apps.” You were right to doubt them. You were right the first time.